You Know What Pisses Me Off?: The Remake Edition
You Know What Pisses Me Off?: The Remake Edition is TCA's revival of his rants series. He re-imagined it to be more brutally honest and offensive, using colourful language and euphemisms ("Japanese people commit sepuku..."), which is either a new style or an evolution of the previous style. Posts Music You know what pisses me off? This current culture of partying and clubbing. I mean, people always have and always will party and clubs will always be a thing, but have any of you listened to any music on the radio lately? Like, really LISTENED to it? The fact it's on the radio is already an indicator of suck, since Top 40 stations tend to play the garbage the uneducated masses listen to, but you'll realise that all these current songs are about partying and clubbing. Every single one. For example, one that's really popular is the Party Rock Anthem. Aside from not being a rock song, contrary to what its name would imply, and the fact that it sucks, is the fact that this song is like a paradigm of everything wrong with the music of 2009-2011 so far. It's such a generic, bland, and terrible song, and the lyrics don't even try to be intelligible, instead repeating "Party Rock" like a million times, with that annoying techno riff in the background constantly. Also, the singers are douchebags, and I could throw them into a dungeon maze of mirrors specifically designed to reflect upon them how pathetic their miserable and talentless lives are, and how much emptier they've made the world by releasing such an abomination of a song. Anyway, that is one of many. All these modern songs about partying all night, clubs not being able to handle you, and picking up women at clubs to presumably have sexual intercourse with are horrible, horrible songs, and also horrible ideas. I think you'd be likely to be labelled a sex offender rather than a pimp if you walked up to a girl and told her "Tonight I'm ****ing You", or, "Give me everything tonight". The gratuitous use of "tonight" in all these songs makes it worse. Do you know what the most horrible word to use in a song is? The most predictable, overused, and also most terribly sued word is? The word "tonight". Which is odd, because the song "Tonight, Tonight" by the Smashing Pumpkins (No, not "Tonight, Tonight" by Hot Chelle Rae - That song sucks) is a great song, and indeed one of my favourite songs (The fact it's not about partying and rather about how our lives are constantly changing and we leave behind our past helps). So the fact that almost every single one of these songs uses that word a thousand times makes this extremely obvious. It's such an easy word to rhyme, and also extremely relevant to the party and club scene. You don't go partying or clubbing in the morning or afternoon, you go at night, so if you're making a song about it, it's obvious it would have a night theme. The thing that makes this a bad idea is that it's so unoriginal and clichéd that it can't even be take seriously. Wrapping this up, I doubt that this stupid trend in party/club house music will last for much longer, although I use that term relatively, kind of like how saying "this thirty year long war shouldn't last much longer" would equate to thinking about the next two to three years rather than a few months. At some point, people realise the party has to end, and hopefully maybe re-evaluate how outrageously stupid these songs were in retrospect. Admittance You know what pisses me off? When people cannot admit when a movie sucks. I was talking to a friend about Vampires Suck being a terrible, crappy movie, and possibly one of the worst ever made, and he said "It didn't suck, it was okay." A LOT of people defend the movie this way. Listen, if you enjoyed a movie like Vampires Suck, that's okay. You can enjoy bad films. That's why The Room or Birdemic are so popular - Bad movies can indeed be enjoyable. BUT. Can anyone honestly say they're good movies? This is a common problem, especially among people with bad taste. I'm just throwing this out there: Vampires Suck was terrible. Transformers 2 was awful. Sorcerer's Apprentice sucked. Green Lantern sucked. All of these movies? They suck. This is not an opinion, this is a fact. However, can they be enjoyable to watch? Yes. In the same way that ten year olds love toilet humour, there is always going to be an audience of people with different tastes in what they like. Do there exist people who think Disaster Movie is actually funny? Yes. Is Disaster Movie a good movie? No. Will people say it is anyway? Yup. So, to wrap up this rant, it's okay if you like bad movies. I love the Super Mario Bros movie to death. However, I do not think Super Mario Bros is a good movie. I think it's a horrible piece of garbage. Be aware of the actual quality of a movie you enjoy as opposed to the perceived quality based on how much you enjoy it. On the other hand, a movie can be the greatest thing ever made and you don't have to enjoy it. I know people who can't stand to watch Citizen Kane or 2001: A Space Odyssey. So I just want everyone to know that you can have a terrible taste in movies, but even if your taste in movies is the equivalent of a person's corpse whose fingers have been replaced with tentacles and whose legs were replaced with copies of Glenn Beck's "Arguing With Idiots", you should not defend a bad movie as being good. A bad movie is a bad movie. If you liked Vampires Suck, good for you. If you think it's actually a good film, you need to be dumped into a bin of burning Twilight books while listening to Black Eyed Peas. Speaking of Black Eyed Peas, a band so offensive to all 19 senses that listening to them causes your body to sweat in shame and loss of dignity, the same goes for music. You can enjoy a song that sucks, as evidenced by the Rebecca Black thing with "Friday". But you should not claim that it's actually good if, in reality, it plain sucks. It's okay if you enjoy the Black Eyed Peas, because that must mean you're a masochist, and that's okay. The Black Eyed Peas, however, are not a good band. As I said before, they suck. The moral of this story is: Something sucks. Don't claim it doesn't suck, because it does. You can enjoy things that suck, but you must have the dignity to admit that it really does suck. The Black-Eyed Peas You know what pisses me off? The Black-Eyed Peas. It's well-known that in my opinion, the Black Eyed Peas are the worst band in the world, and that Google, although fairly having its own opinion on the worst band in the world being Creed, should acknowledge the fact that BEP are worse. Every song they make causes me to bleed profusely from my eyes, and all the money they both spend and make on those songs could instead be used to collectively feed the entirety of the population of Somalia. In fact, all the undeserved money they make could be used to prop up the entire economies of Somalia, with enough left over for the Democratic Republic of the Congo, North Korea, and South Sudan. In a few years, they will fade into obscurity and we will be glad they're gone. Japanese people commit sepuku when they realise that in retrospect, the BEP mutilated their honour in a way that makes their ancestors weep acidic, flaming blood from the grave. The Black-Eyed Peas negative influence is such that if they were to cease existing, the world would be a much better place. Macs "Not Getting Viruses" Myth You know what pisses me off? When people say Macs don't get viruses. They do. Quick, tell me: What's the main reason most viruses exist today? They don't just appear, people actually have to write them. Their most common use is to steal your information, as well as to make your computer unsafe and infect it with advertisements or malware. They do this for personal, monetary or informational gain. So, why do people assume there are no viruses on Macs? Look at the market share of Mac computers in comparison to Windows computers. Macs have a relatively low ratio in ownership to Windows computers, and thus, for the same reason the PlayStation 3 was unhackable for a good six years as opposed to the Xbox 360, which gets hacked like, every day, people who write viruses didn't see much benefit from such a small population of people when they have all these Windows computers so prevalent in society. Even the government uses Windows. Recently, due to the increase in hipsters and Apple's popularity, Macs have become more common, so guess what's becoming more common on Mac computers? That's right, viruses. Macs have always had viruses floating around for them, it's just that such a relatively small amount of people get them that it's almost unheard of to get viruses. Thus, a common thing people like to say when doing their "Macs are better!" speech is that Macs "don't get viruses". Which is entirely false. Everything and anything that is a computer can have a virus. Mac, Linux, Windows, even the analytical engine could get viruses. It's only a matter of both time and prominence. So before you think, "Hey, Macs don't get viruses!", be aware that they do, in fact, get viruses, and over time, this will become even more and more common, because there's a growing Mac market, and more Macs means more reasons to make said viruses. Also, Macs suck, so don't get them anyway. It's all about Linux. Unnecessary Single- or Multi-Player You know what pisses me off? Call of Duty and games similar to it. First off, it's clear that these games suck. Or should I say, their single-player campaigns suck, because it's obvious the developers don't care about the single-player aspect and it is merely an excuse to train people for the multiplayer. I think these games should be purely multiplayer. In attempting to create both a single-player and a multi-player experience, both end up sucking and leeching off the other. Since they're too incompetent to make a good enough story to have a single-player that holds up well, they should just skip to the part 80% of the players of these games care about and focus on the multiplayer. After all, why make a garbage single and multi player combination game when you can have either a great single player or a great multiplayer? Some games work better as one or the other, but not both. There are games out there that we've seen just don't, and indeed CAN'T work as multiplayer-games, even if the developers were really trying to push it. BioShock is better single-player. The multiplayer in BioShock 2 was terrible and at the moment, completely abandoned. All the time spent working on that piece of garbage could have instead been used to make the single-player better. Instead, by trying to have both types of game modes, it ended up making both suck. On the other train, Call of Duty has horrible single-player that you can finish in like 4 hours. It's so blatantly obvious that Call of Duty is a multiplayer game with a training mode accidentally called Campaign that the developers should just cut out the Campaign entirely because it's never good. Just make a game like MAG. Judge the quality of MAG all you want, at least it knew what it was going for and who it was targeting. It's a multiplayer game capable of pitting 250 players against each other, and I personally thought it was a great idea. No unnecessary single-player, because the people who made it knew the people who buy it are only interested in the multiplayer. My point is: Stop adding in multiplayer where it doesn't belong (BioShock), and also don't add in a single-player that you obviously don't care about (Call of Duty). Fandoms You know what pisses me off? Fandoms. Fandoms will defend to the death everything relating to what they're a fandom of, even if they embarrass themselves or go too far in the process. They can be jerks if anyone says anything contrary to the opinion of the fandom. Basically, they're the Borg. The Legend of Zelda. Good games? Sure, maybe. Is Ocarina of Time really the greatest game ever made? Hell no. Not even close. Tell that to a Zelda fanboy, though, and he'll insist it's better than every other game out there and always will be better than every other game out there. Which is wrong. As video games advance and people learn to create more engaging plots and better graphics and gameplay, games like Ocarina of Time become dated. Sure, it might be a good game, and for it's time, maybe a great game. But video games march on. If everyone had that attitude of "Welp, this is as good as it gets, let's pack our stuff because we can't beat Ocarina of Time", then games wouldn't innovate, they wouldn't try new things, and they certainly HAVE done things better than OoT, improved upon it, and made better games. The Zelda fandom is so rabid that every single Zelda game can do no wrong. Ocarina of Time is the most overrated game in the world. This is not an opinion, this is a fact, because if Zelda fanboys had their way, Ocarina of Time would be in the Smithsonian Museum, or the Louvre next to the Mona Lisa. If you stop to think for a second, Zelda fanboy or not, you can see that this is ridiculous. You're basically doing the equivalent of worshipping a video game and putting it on an unrealistically high pedestal. And it's not just the Zelda fandom. Almost every fandom is stupid in this way too. Allow me to bring up a webcomic I enjoy: Homestuck, from MS Paint Adventures. Yes. I read Homestuck. I enjoy it a lot, it's one of the better webcomics (Well, it's not really a webcomic, it's a... Thing. A really cool thing with flash animations and music). But I am not part of the fandom. Have you SEEN the fandom? I mean, man, they're like a pack of wild dogs. I've never seen such reverence for something based entirely on the Internet. Is Homestuck great? Sure, we're entitled to our opinions, and I personally find it fun. Is it the God of Webcomics that the fandom makes it out to be? Not really. It's very well-known I'm a Castlevania fanboy. But even my fanboyism for that series does not place me into the fandom. I don't post on Castlevania specific websites, I've never cosplayed as a Castlevania character, I don't claim that Symphony of the Night is the greatest game ever and nothing will ever beat it and that all modern games suck in comparison (Sound familiar, Zelda fanboys?). I don't subscribe myself to any fandom. Why? Because fandoms are stupid. They're, for the most part, like a hive mind. The freaking Borg. Assimilation, and all that jazz. I'm not saying that everyone in a fandom is blind to, well, everything. There are certainly mature people who subscribe to fandom who don't take it so seriously as to murder people who say that something they like relating to it sucks. It's okay to be a fan of something. Hell, I've cosplayed steampunk at conventions and when the next one comes around I plan to do the same. But I've never once attacked someone who disagreed with steampunk, or obsessively read or posted on every steampunk forum on the web, or dedicated my life to it. If you're going to be part of a fandom, don't be a complete bloody twit about it. Not everybody thinks it's the greatest thing since the invention of the analytical engine. Heat You know what pisses me off? Heat. It's like the worst thing ever and I don't know how people can love tropical places so much. With cold weather, all you do is add on maybe another layer, which shouldn't be a huge problem if you're not even going to be outside for long, with air conditioning and such inside. Plus, with too much heat, you can get no snow, like in Miami. Winter is the best season and should never be ruined in that way. Acrylic Paint You know what pisses me off? Painting using acrylics. In my painting class, we're required to use acrylics, but I have a huge problem with this: Acrylics dry too quickly. I would lay out my entire palette with all these colours and values, and by the time I finish with one section and start needing to add other colours or values, they've dried up, meaning I have to mix them AGAIN. And mixing every time I'm going to add a new colour of value is just extremely obnoxious. I've done paintings before in oils, and it's MUCH better. Aside from the fact oils look better, oils also take forever to dry, which is a good thing because it allows you to fix things and add details and mix and come back to parts without worrying about it drying up and making things difficult. It takes about three weeks to a month or so for oils to dry, and if you're in no real hurry to make a nice-looking painting, then that's not a problem. Acrylics, by default, almost HAVE to come out looking like crap because you have to rush to make them. They waste so much paint due to their quick drying as well and don't mix as easily as oils do. I hate acrylics. I don't know what idiot thought they would be a good idea to use in a painting. I understand their use for non-painting (canvas art painting, that is) purposes, but they're absolutely horrible in paintings. All of my paintings for my painting class have come out looking like crap because of the disadvantages of acrylics as opposed to oils. My oil paintings come out so much better. Non-TCA Posts Joe Batman and Robin Do you know what pisses me off? The movie "Batman and Robin" Because I just rewatched that piece of crap, and God it is horrible. Modern Gaming You know what pisses me off? What this generation of gaming has become. I was very excited about the Wii when it came out, I thought that the Wii-Mote would allow developers to create games similar to what we can play on the 360 and the PS3 but with more innovative controls, and some companies actually did a pretty good job with the controls using the Wii-mote. The new Zelda game looks like it will be good, the Metroid Prime games on the Wii have some of the best FPS controls I have ever used but instead of trying to create good games most of what has come out on the Wii is crappy shovelware games and minigame compilations filled with waggle controls. While the Wii does have some great games, there is just so much crap out there. And now with the 360 (since I have much more experience with it than the PS3), I thought it was much better when it came out as well. There were a lot of great games coming out with great graphics, online play, controls, etc. Even though it was a pain in the ass paying 50 bucks a year for Xbox Live, especially when PSN lets you do most of the same stuff for free, I enjoyed it. I also loved how the old Xbox menu was set up, the old Xbox blades were great. But around the time the Kinect was announced everything got worse. I knew from the start that the Kinect would suck. For one, I knew that it would be expensive, and that it would only work with a limited number and type of games. It is some really impressive technology, I will say that, but for making the types of games the Xbox was known for it just does not work. And I feel the same way about that PS3 Wii-mote clone with the glowing ball on the tip that looks like a vibrator. Yes, the technology is good, but where Nintendo wins here is that the system was actually built with their motion controls in mind. The PS3 does a better job with their motion controller since it is similar to the Wii-mote and developers already know how to adjust their controls to go with it, but with the Kinect almost everything on there is the same crap you see on the Wii. Minigame compilations, on rails shooters, and some other random crap that is usually just not very good. And now Microsoft is trying to find ways to shoehorn the controls into all of the 360 games like they are trying to say "yes hardcore gamers, there really is a reason to buy the Kinect, PLEASE BUY IT!!!". The evolution of their image also seems to be copying everything that Nintendo has done wrong over the last couple of years while trying to describe their system as an all in one entertainment console or something like that. Dude, I buy video game consoles to play video games, I don't care about being able to watch commercials and share them over twitter! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pdl4PU9tr0Q. And I still want the old Xbox main menu back, the new one that looks like the Windows Phone looks awful and all of the themes that it looks like I wasted my money on will be useless now. On a similar topic, why the hell did you increase the price of Xbox Live by 10 dollars for each year, only to add more advertisements on the main menu? You are making us pay more to see more ads? What the hell? Shouldn't it be the other way around you greedy asswipes? And now we move on to the things about this generation that annoys me the most. The nickel and diming that our wallets are enduring now. DLC has just gotten incredibly bad now with tons of content being released now, but it is amazingly overpriced. Over 10 dollars for four maps in Call of Duty? That is insane. The part that annoys me the most with this is that developers now just release games with bugs that should have been fixed before the game came out, and they release it with DLC coming out right after the game is released that should have been included in the game. Sometimes they even have the data on the game already but you have to buy the DLC to access it. Greedy ****s. I miss the days where you could download DLC from the developers of the game for free on the Computer. You also have franchises being run into the ground more than they ever were before. Call of Duty is currently the most guilty of this, and the franchise as a whole has just gotten worse since the fourth one came out which was a great game. Guitar Hero is the most guilty of this (Shocker! Another Activision game!) with over 15 games being released between 2005 and 2010 and eventually the sales died down so much after the oversaturation of Guitar Hero and other expensive music games with big ass plastic instruments that the entire music game industry has fallen apart. The sequel-itis of releasing one game for each franchise every year should stop or people will get completely burnt out from all of the series that just won't die and are being ran straight into the ground. Preorder bonuses, especially ones that only go to certain stores. And the super expensive limited edition versions of games that have nothing worth getting included in the box. I dislike them greatly. And finally, online modes being shoehorned into every game and the awful online communities. I am just sick of games like Bioshock 2 having online modes forced into them much like TCA is, and all of the time spent making that could be spent making the game have a better, longer singleplayer mode. But no, games are short as hell now, and they need to have an online mode for people to buy them. And then the online communities are filled with racist 13 year old stoner jackasses blasting death metal or rap music over their headsets. It is pretty much impossible for me to play online with my headset in at this point unless I am only playing with people I know. And when I play against random people. you wind up going against a ton of cheaters who use cheap tactics and just make it unfun to play online. At this point I am completely burnt out from playing online, and I miss the days of playing with three friends on a couch with one TV. It would be nice if these games could include bots to play against more often too, I'd rather play against the AI than these human jackasses. John You know what pisses me off? The fat assistant instructor in my theatre tech class. He's not helpful, he won't lift anything, he smells bad, and he's disruptive. When the professor or someone else gives you an assignment, they'll at least confirm whether or not you know how, and if you've done it before. Fat guy will just stand over your shoulder and gripe at you, and if you ask him to hold something for you or help lift something impossible to move on your own, he walks away for twenty minutes, pulling people away from their tasks for something he could just help with himself. He doesn't even seem to know anything about any task. When I offer a logical solution, like using a skill saw to cut a curved set of tracks for the revolve to run on, or even pulling out a misfired staple with a pair of pliers, he stops me and runs off to confirm what to do with the professor, who yells at him to just do what I ALREADY SAID. He constantly hangs around my group if I'm working with the cute girl in my class. The girl is usually helpful and decently bright, but the dude won't stop asking her stupid questions. I frankly want to headbutt him in the nose and teach him a little damn professionalism, and I'm a hare's breath away from letting his boss know he's disruptive and unhelpful, and if I do I hope there are either consequences for him or he learns to start doing his job and quit stopping us from doing ours. Category:Topics